50 Shades of Psychotherapy

I’m not prone to writing about books or reviewing them. For the simple reason is who am I too pour scorn on something an author has poured their heart and soul into. But I will make the exception for 50 shades of grey though.

50 Shades of Grey was originally to be titled Master of the Universe. Now where have I heard that before……


50 shades of grey was developed as fan fiction of Twilight, the sexually repressed vampire series of books that were turned into films.  Fan fiction is essentially that. Fans of imitating the original work.  Essentially the author E.L James was writing vampire porn and at a later date reworked Master of the Universe into an original work and retitled it 50 Shades of grey. That’s the background to these crimes against humanity.

The plot of the book is manipulative billionaire (is there any other kind) Christian Grey, has Anastasia Steele sign a contract with him saying she has to be his sexual submissive. They even have a red room of pain. When I think red room of pain, I think of being locked in a room with a bunch of socialists. It is a character driven book. The characters are mildly amusing not intentionally, they are interesting people but in need of serious psychotherapy.

On finishing the book I was horrified to realise that the book was the first in a trilogy and there are two other books out there. You think of other famous series of books or trilogies.  The girl with the dragon tattoo, The Chronicles of Narnia, The God Father, The Lord of the Rings. It is just not comparable with any of those in literary terms. The only thing it has in common with Lord of the Rings is some fella is waving his stick around a lot.

The second book is titled Fifty Shades of Darker, Christian finds out Darth Vader is his father and he joins the dark side. The third book is titled Fifty Shades of Freed, Christian travels the world buying beautiful women out of sexual slavery for his own needs.

The books writing style is very simplistic. It reminded me of Anne and Barry. Irish people of a certain age will remember the Anne and Barry series of children’s school books, where the book documents everyday life of Anne and Barry’s family.

There is a reason the book 50 shades of grey is called mammy porn. That’s because men don’t read porn…. If you are man hoping to get some thrill out of this book id give it a miss. 50 Shades of Grey it is to the male sex drive what kryptonite is to Superman.

So if you have a copy of the book instead of reading it you can always use it as……





or you could try your hand at Origami

You could always keep warm

Normal political and current affairs ranting will resume shortly.


About Paul Duggan

Politics, humour, Liberal, Curmudgeon, Rogue. Creator and author of Irish Shades of Grey.
This entry was posted in Irish media, Social commentary and tagged , , . Bookmark the permalink.

9 Responses to 50 Shades of Psychotherapy

  1. Advocating book burning? haha Great blog Paul

  2. Paul, something has been bothering me for quite a while. How can you be liberal and Fine Gael at the same time? Oh,and by the way, I love your blogs :))

  3. Hazel Katherine Larkin says:

    @Bernie – Fifty Shades of Fine Gael? 🙂

    Love the review, Paul. Was never going to read the book, but now I don’t think I’d even bother to use it for suggestion #1. 🙂


  4. irishminx says:

    I’d have preferred to have read your version of Anne and Barry :))
    Well done for reviewing something outside your normal scope Paul.
    I haven’t read the book, in fact, you were the person who brought it to my attention.
    Glad I am not your mans submissive!
    But then, I wouldn’t be!


  5. eden baylee says:

    This is priceless. Got redirected via @smoran26 . Like you, I don’t write bad reviews for the same reason, but I could not get through the first 50 pages of the first book due to the poor quality of the writing.

    As an writer of the genre, I am still assessing whether it’s a good thing erotica has been pushed to the forefront with this series. Good writing should transcend genre; my concern is the newbies who’ve read the Grey series will think it is representative of all erotic writing—it certainly is not.

    How serendipitous that you write about Ireland, one of my favorite countries. Good to connect with you here.


  6. You wouldn’t find being locked in a room with me all pain

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